For quite some time, I have been working on ways to relieve some stress in my life and quell the anxiety that has rattled me since being laid off. I don’t like not having a plan. I don’t like not knowing what’s going to happen with the bills. I’m the kind of person that needs to have a plan and a back up plan and it seems that all that has gone out the window.
Recently, I blogged about an accident that totaled my car. And without a job and bills piling up, the stress was beginning to suffocate me.
Then, a temporary job came along. And just like all the other times that we were almost in trouble, something came along to help. Maybe not solve the problem entirely, but enough to get us through to the next moment.
In all this chaos, I’m starting to feel a strange calm under the worry. The kind of calm that tells me that even though things aren’t how I planned, things will work out. It will get better. It’s been a long time since that feeling has surfaced. I’m wondering if I can keep it around.
When I was a teenager, I loved not knowing what would come next. I loved not having a plan and making last minute decisions. Worry never crossed my mind when I didn’t have enough money to fill up my gas tank. I don’t ever expect to get back to that feeling, but I would like to remind myself that the worrying is pointless. It only hinders the attempt to achieve a goal.
We do what we can do. We try our best. We may not always get the turnout we are looking for, but we keep moving and we keep working. Everything is temporary. Everything is always changing. If you let worrying slow you down, you’ll never get where you’re going.
It’s true. I totally hate exercising. It’s exhausting. It makes my body hurt. After I’m done, I have to sit down for 20 minutes to let the endorphins settle. I can’t even eat afterwards or else I’ll feel sick. Yet, I just keep doing it…
In one of my earlier posts, I mentioned how I had some health issues in the beginning of the year. Well, as part of making “my life right”, this is something I needed to work on. Sometime around March, I decided to take back my health and start exercising and being more careful of how I eat. Ever since, I have been working out at least 5 times a week. I started with a nice easy yoga workout that I found on my cable on demand menu. When I started to feel like my muscles were holding up, I added a Jillian Michaels workout once or twice a week. I try to fit in a bike ride or a walk whenever I can. Additionally, I make more trips up and down the stairs on purpose for an extra benefit.
With no particular weight goal in mind, I started losing the pounds that have still lingered three years after having my daughter. Twenty pounds later, I’m feeling healthier and stronger. Most days I have more energy, but on the days that I don’t, I don’t feel so bad about being lazy because I work so hard the rest of the week.
So, what’s the point, you ask. If I can do it, anyone can do it. I despise turning on the TV and working out. I dread having the sore muscles and losing a half hour of my day so that I can collapse in a heap of sweat. I finally found workouts that I can tolerate. My body is under my control again. The pounds have started disappearing and I feel better about my health and about the way I look. More confidence = feeling even better. And because of the daily endorphin rush, I’m happier. Happier even though I’m doing something that I don’t want to do. Weird, right?
This month, I’m adding Tae Bo workouts….look out!